I love to people watch. Absolutely love it. One of my favorite pastimes, without a doubt. Europe, as you can probably imagine, has proved to be an ever expanding collection of awesomeness for someone with my affinity for checking people out. During our layover in Paris, I spent the entire time posted up in front of one of the security lines with Matt, just watching the people come out. I don’t know exactly, but I’d say we spent at least two hours cracking jokes about everyone we saw. I loved every minute of it.
Here in Muonio I get to combine people watching with one of my other favorite activities: skiing. So far I’ve seen an Estonian who is a dead-ringer for Glenn Randall and a Swedish biathlon coach who strongly reminds me of my dear friend and former coach, Peter Graves. Every time I see Estonian Glenn Randall I wonder what will happen when American Glenn Randall gets here and they ski past each other. I imagine meeting your European doppelganger would be somewhat jarring.
Skiing laps on a 3.8k loop with dozens of other skiers has also given me time to come up with a few conclusions about Europe, which I will now share with you:
- Finns love Finnish-made equipment. I’m talking stuff that has never been seen in the US outside of Minnesota. Rex poles (notable because they are Robin Hood green), Peltonen skis, and the little-known Karhu racing ski (complete with a neon orange base and an awesome name: Volcans. I can only imagine they meant to call them Volcanos? Or maybe Vulcans?) are all represented in force here. I’ve got half a mind to try to trade for the Karhu drink belt I saw this morning.
- Russians train really hard, all the time. There are tons of Russians here right now. Pepa said there were clubs from Moscow and Saint Petersburg, in addition to the national team, whose van says “Russian National Ski Team” in German on it (thumbs up for usage of the word “mannschaft,” always a crowd pleaser). The women in particular seem to be skiing wicked hard all the time. There’s a great clip of Matt being rolled up by a tiny Russian girl just hammering her brains out. Ask him about it. One girl I saw was wearing full warm-ups that she had sweat all the way through. She did not smell great. But, they are fast, so maybe there’s something to their methodology.
- Eastern European coaches hate skiing. Not the sport, but the actual physical act of skiing. So far I’ve seen national team coaches from Estonia, Russia, Belarus, Ukraine, and I think Latvia (in addition to numerous club coaches from Russia). None of these men ski. They stand around, often together, in big jackets, watching. Always watching. Sometimes they’ll whip out a video camera (the Estonian guy especially likes his camera). Often they’ll shout something at a passing athlete. But seldom do they move and even more seldom do they ski. Groups of them will congregate at trail intersections to chat, smoke cigarettes, and drink from thermoses. I like to think that it is a hold over from the days when the Soviets used to post up guys in the woods to keep athletes from defecting. Poor guys probably don’t know what to do with themselves anymore. Since they are so often in the same places, I’ve taken to nodding to them as I pass, hoping for a nod back. Most give it to me, but the Belorussians have been resisting. I’ll break them, though.
- Pepa is the most popular person on the trails. This should not surprise you. She’s a babe and the only female coach out there (I think the Swedish biathlon team has a few female staff members, but I can’t figure out exactly what they do). All the coaches like to chat with Pepa. It’s been especially great for Chelsea, because she’s scored a few choice interviews through Pepa’s connections. All I know is Pepa better watch out or she’s going to find herself beating off suitors like Odysseus’s wife Penelope.
That’s all I’ve got for now. Gotta get back to my tiny cabin to eat some duo spread (think cake frosting mixed with Nutella) and put my feet up.
Note: I’m just making a joke about the post-communist coaches. I’m sure those guys actually know a lot about skiing and are doing a good job. The difference between the way they conduct themselves on the trails and the ways American coaches act just begs the comparison. No offense meant to Eastern Europeans.